I’ve asked myself this question so many times:

Are you more committed to being right, or being rich?

I mean, is it more important to you, sis, to be right about your point of view … about what you know … about what you’ve done …

… than it is to be RICH? (And I’m talkin’ for real for real rich—so you can actually effect change.)

I’ll tell you what I’ve been asking myself—what I am really BEing with lately:

Am I more committed to being right about Black men—how they’re fucked up and how they don’t do a damn thing for us and how I don’t care—or am I more committed to being rich with them?

It’s a real question. Because theoretically, if Black women are THE most educated group in North America, then there is NO reason why there should be a single Black man who ISN’T winning!

#realtalk: Who is taking care of them??

Who’s telling them that they’re loved … that they were made in the image and likeness of God?

Who is explaining to Black men that they too deserve forgiveness?

God forgives.

God also has a temper. And we forgive God, don’t we?

We forgive Him for getting so pissed off with Adam and Eve for eating an apple (seriously!) that He gave women childbearing pain for the rest of our existence! (DEAR CHRISTIANS: Don’t get triggered by this assertion. I know the wrath of God in the Garden of Eden was about obedience, not the apple, but the principle of God’s temper still applies. So please don’t post to correct me. Hear me out and hear what I am pointing to. Please.)

A little extreme, I think.

So, God can be extreme.

Why the f#@k can’t I?

If I’m made in the image and likeness of God, then it doesn’t make sense to me to act like God is even-tempered. You see what I’m saying here?

I’m NOT even-tempered.

And God forgives me. Even when I’m not sure I deserve it.

Bottom line: There are things that we can do and give to others that they didn’t earn. Maybe they don’t even deserve it.

These are acts of grace. Of mercy.

Isn’t that what it means to love somebody?

Isn’t that what it means to be “Godly”?

Last question now:

If those answers are “yes,” then why are we keeping score??

I’d love to hear your thoughts. Please comment below, so we can bear witness.


12 Responses to “Are You Committed to Being Right, or Rich?”

Comments List

  1. Jenese

    Forgiveness is the key. And what you are saying is right. I had to reflect on a meeting I had Tuesday. Would I rather be right or successful? I would rather be successful and enact change as I go along. I’m a firm believer that no one walking this earth can love a black man like a black women. I’m committed from this day forward to success and wealth. It’s by God’s grace and mercy that we are all are as fortunate as we are
  2. Krista

    There are some of us who do go over and beyond to ensure that the black man is loved and appreciated. I think sometimes its up to that man to accept these things. They are so used to the "angry black woman" they are quick to leave insted of cherish or learn the love lesson.
    • Dr. Venus

      Hi Krista, I hear you. I am working on a teaching around the historical wound of Black Men respected and Black Women being heard. These two wounds get acted out in our relationships and in our money. I will be working on this for a minute. Once I have it built, I will address the "leaving" of Black Men. Right now, it looks as if when wounded Black Men feel or think they have been disrespected, their sense of self is annihilated. Not their ego, their very identity. It is a historical wound. Give me a couple of rotations. I'm thinking of doing a "Black Men Only" Series to address exactly what you are stating. It's coming. And on behalf of all the men you have loved, THANK YOU! Even if you didn't see the fruits of your love, it made a difference... Dr. Venus
  3. Joanne Wolaridge

    Hi Dr. Venus, This definitely hit a nerve. Forgiveness is something I am struggling with. Logically, I understand the topic, but emotionally I am blocked. Moving past the hurt and pain that has taken place in my relationship is something I don't know how to do. There are days when I feel at peace and other days when I am in turmoil. A lot of stuff has happened over the course of time that I feel needs to be addressed, but not sure how to. The ability to communicate gets lost in either party taking the stand to be right. Neither of us hears the other person's point of view. What suggestions do you have to heal and move forward?
    • Dr. Venus

      Hi Joanne, It's a great question. Let's go back to being block about forgiving. I have learned that when I can't forgive it's because I am attached to dominating the other person. And I am pushing God out. I always have to walk in the other person's shoes to see their point of view. It takes something for me to do so. And I have to remember this is someone God gave me to love. Imperfections and all--for both of us. I Forgie to set myself free to do God's work. Lastly, I give up the entire concept of "fair."Life is not fair and people say and do fucked up shit. So I get to be a leader in my life. I have to sack up and tell the truth to myself why I am staying in a situation that hurts both of us? Either forgive and accept the person for who they are or leave. That's leadership. To stay in a situation with someone you cannot forgive (for real for real) is emotional jail. This requires a level of accountability, responsibility and emotional maturity that is VERY adult. If you choose to take on being a leader in your life, you soar. I hope this helps... Dr. Venus
  4. Areatha

    I think being rich come with discipline, sacrifice, and worthiness and knowing your shit. "According to the scripture the rib which the Lord God had taken from man, made he a woman and the man said this is now bone of my bones, the flesh of my flesh and she shall be call "Woman" because she was taken out of "Man". Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto woman only to make her the carrier of his wrath by not professing, protecting, and/or providing for her which lead to the forbidden fruit that opened her eyes to see woman can "conquer and rule as the Goddesses we are", knowing good, evil and the bullshit. And everything else to come Love thyself first and only then we can know our worth and the true meaning of being rich. #just saying
    • Dr. Venus

      I love your #justsayin! :-) Thank you, Areatha, for your Word and appreciate you sharing it with us. Sincerely, Dr. Venus
  5. Lisa ROMER-KING

    We forgive but forget the hurt that individal caused us amd question God why the pain. The pain is growth for the next adventure that we will travel through.

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